How a North East choir gave a grieving mother a new lease of life

Rock Choir North East has often been a pillar of support for members struggling with bereavement, divorce, mental health problems and more. However, for one member in particular, the choir has done so much more… 

In February 2022, Rock Choir North East member, Dawn Bailey, passed away at St Cuthbert’s Hospice in Durham. 

During her final days in the Hospice, her family discussed her great loves in life – one of them being Rock Choir. This was the moment her mother, 69-year-old Chester-le-Street resident, Maria Bailey, decided that she would take her daughter’s place in the choir. 

Fast forward to the present day, and Maria now organises an annual Rock Choir fundraising concert in Dawn’s memory. 

Maria joined Rock Choir aiming to keep her daughter’s passion alive. However, in doing so, she discovered a passion of her own. I met up with Maria at St Cuthbert’s Hospice, as she told me about how the choir helped her through grief and ultimately, changed her life. 

Over 3 years ago, on the day after Dawn’s funeral, Maria became a member of Rock Choir North East. 

Although she’d seen Dawn perform several times, walking into her first rehearsal, she had little knowledge of what Rock Choir involved or what to expect. 

She said: “The first thing I heard was somebody shout: ‘Maria, come and sit here! This is where Dawn used to sit!’”.  

“I felt a thump in my chest because I hadn’t expected that, to be recognised. Also, I’d never been in a choir before. I didn’t know about harmony parts, or which part I sang. It turned out, I sing the same as Dawn used to sing- lower Alto”, she added. 

Dawn was a talented, enthusiastic and cherished member of Rock Choir, who was well known due to her bubbly, outgoing personality, and because she had a beautiful voice and sang solo. 

Noting the impact of joining the choir, Maria said: “The biggest comfort at the time was that I was surrounded by people who knew Dawn and loved her and had performed with her over the years”. 

Having first joined Rock Choir when she moved to West Yorkshire, Dawn had been a dedicated ‘Rockie’ for around 10 years. She later became a member of Rock Choir North East, when she returned home following the breakdown of her marriage.  

But, her love of music didn’t start there. 

For Dawn, music had always been a passion as Maria described her as a keen singer, performer and self-taught guitarist. Prior to her Rock Choir days, when she was living in Brighton, she was also part of another choir, Brighton City Singers. 

Unfortunately, however, it was whilst she was living in Brighton that she first started to show signs of illness. 

When she was 31 and around 4 months pregnant with her daughter, Dawn was diagnosed with a brain tumour. As the tumour was stable, she was advised to carry on with her pregnancy, giving birth in July 2010. 

The family soon moved to Leeds, where, when her daughter was just over a year old, Dawn had surgery to remove most of the tumour. 

“She eventually made what seemed like a complete recovery. She really did very well, and life went back to normal”, said Maria. 

However, around 5 years later, Dawn needed further treatment. Unfortunately, this was far from straightforward, and Dawn went through a very difficult phase for some time. 

Following the breakdown of her marriage, Dawn moved back to the North East with her daughter, to live with Maria and her husband for a short time. 

With the support of her family and her own undeniable strength, Dawn once again, made a complete recovery.  

Having received lots of counselling through the NHS as part of her recovery, during one of her final sessions, she expressed a strong interest in working in the service herself. Surprisingly, a vacancy was soon advertised, and she became an online trainer for the NHS Recovery College in Durham, where she was able to use her own experiences to help others. 

Maria said: “It was everything she wanted […] that was her last job and she absolutely loved it”. 

In 2018, Dawn met her “soulmate”. They bought a house together in September 2021 and became engaged in November that year. Sadly, soon afterwards, Dawn became unwell again and was admitted to hospital in February 2022.  

Dawn remained in hospital for two weeks, where her condition deteriorated. The family were told the devastating news that, for some unknown reason, her chemotherapy had stopped working. Consequently, the remaining part of her brain tumour was growing quickly and nothing more could be done for her.  

Luckily, Dawn was able to get a place at St Cuthbert’s Hospice and was there for 7 days before she sadly passed away at the age of 43. 

During our interview, Maria and I spoke about the personal, thoughtful and compassionate approach at St Cuthbert’s Hospice. In fact, it was our mutual connection with the charity that brought us together in the first place.  

In August 2016, just over 9 years ago now, my own mother passed away from cancer at the Hospice. She was the same age as Dawn- just 43 years old.  

Our shared, first-hand experience of the care at St Cuthbert’s gave Maria and I an extra level of understanding and we both praised their incredible work.  

She commented: “The Hospice was just like a haven. They looked after her so well, but they looked after us. We really did feel they put their arms around us. We were treated like royalty”.  

She highlighted one particular experience with the nurses: 

“One morning, after the staff had tended to Dawn, they came out of the room and they said, ‘We’ve just asked her if there’s anything else she wanted […] and she said a chilled rosé’ because she didn’t really drink, but she liked the occasional rosé wine. The nurse looked really concerned, she said, ‘We haven’t got rosé, we’ve only got white or red. Do you think she’ll have one of them?’ and I said, ‘She’s only joking!’, but they were so concerned that that’s what she fancied and wondered how they could do it”, she recalled.  

The next night, Dawn’s fiancé brought in a bottle of Dawn’s favourite rosé, and the nurses froze some for her as ice cubes. Then, at a certain time, her parents and fiancé, along with other family members who could not be physically with her at the Hospice, all raised a glass of rosé. Maria later put the photos of this into a montage. 

“At that moment in time, we were all together drinking rosé wine, Dawn’s favourite rosé wine- which is horrible!”, she laughed. 

Given all the hardships that Maria and her family have faced, one of the things that struck me most about her was her determined, proactive and accepting philosophy.  

“From the initial devastation of knowing we were going to lose her and why and how, I quickly came to the opinion of, well, we can’t physically change anything […] It’s been about 25 years since I came across a writing in a book, I think it was, that said something like, ‘Learn to accept what you can’t change. Don’t waste your energy, your negative energy, screaming and shouting and look for what you can do’”, she said. 

She added: “Also it’s a case of trying to turn the negative into a positive, and that can be really hard at times, but if you can do that sort of thing, then it really does help you to keep sane, if nothing else […] You just have to try to accept what’s happened, make the best of it and try to carry on”. 

She later said: “It’s either that or lying in bed for weeks on end crying your eyes out – that doesn’t get you anywhere”. 

Following her own advice, Maria decided to do something positive and joined Rock Choir. 

“I joined choir because Dawn was in it and she loved it”, she said. 

In her past, Maria learned British Sign Language and was involved in various aspects of Deaf Education for a number of years. She was a further education lecturer for a few years and taught sign language in local colleges, where she finished every class with a signed song. However, she stopped using sign language when she retired.  

Having not signed for around 5 years, during her second week of Rock Choir, she was informed that there were online sessions available, to learn to sign Rock Choir songs. At first, she wasn’t interested – but curiosity got the better of her.  

“I went online and saw one of the videos and I thought – Wow! I want to do that again!”, she gasped. 

She added: “I got sucked right back in”. 

Maria was the first person in the North East to become a member of Rock Choir’s ‘The Hands That Rock’. Members of this group are allowed to sign songs at public performances. She has now signed at every performance that she’s attended over the last 2 years, helping to widen access to performances. 

She said: “I absolutely love it and I just get lost in the music- it’s absolutely gorgeous”.  

Not long after she joined Rock Choir, Maria found out that most of their performances are fundraisers for charities and that all money raised is donated, as Rock Choir doesn’t charge venues to hold concerts. 

She said: “I had no idea how they support the local community so much and that’s the ethos”. 

Leader of Rock Choir North East, Rob Slater, said: “We believe that music is about more than just performance, it’s about connection. That’s why fundraising and getting involved in the local community is such an important part of what we do. At the core of Rock Choir is kindness, compassion, and unity. Fundraising and community engagement aren’t just side projects; they’re part of our DNA. They help us grow not just as singers, but as people. Supporting local charities and community initiatives is our way of giving back—to say thank you, and to make a real difference in the lives of others”. 

After a few months, Maria asked Rob if they could hold a concert in aid of St Cuthbert’s Hospice, to which he eagerly agreed. 

But, she didn’t stop there. 

She said: “It wasn’t enough for me, just to do a concert. I’m a bit of a perfectionist, which, can be a curse, so, I wanted to give it a title”. 

With that, ‘Keeeeep Rocking for St Cuthbert’s Hospice’ was born. When telling me how she came up with the title, Maria explained that the ‘Keeeeep’ has five E’s because there were five people in the family.  

However, it’s also a “nod to Dawn’s passion for Strictly Come Dancing” (the keeeeep dancing!). When she worked for the BBC, Dawn even got her “dream job” working on the show, one year. 

“She absolutely loved Strictly, always made a fuss. She always had a party night on the grand finale”, said Maria. 

The first ‘Keeeeep Rocking’ concert was held in February 2023, to coincide with Dawn’s first anniversary. Following its huge success, they decided to make it an annual event. 

As a result of their second concert, the choir raised almost £4000. Unsurprisingly, however, Maria didn’t stop there. 

“I thought, it’s not enough, it’s not enough. So, I thought – what else can I do?”, she said. 

Remembering that Dawn loved to crochet and knit, Maria started a project called ‘Keeeeep Stitching’. Coming up with the idea to make fisherman-style beanie hats, Maria anticipated that she would have to do most of the work herself. However, having recruited a “small army” of knitters, who were mainly ‘Rockies’, they raised £2000 in 2 months for the Hospice, far surpassing Maria’s £1000 target. 

“This, to me, was ‘Rockies’’ generosity, again, and their love and support for Dawn”, Maria said. 

She added: “it’s just lovely to be able to do something, keeping her memory alive and for people to show me how much she meant to them by the support we get”. 

On 2nd March 2025, the third ‘Keeeeep Rocking’ concert took place at The Salvation Army in Chester-le-Street, raising over £5000.  

In just three years, family and friends of Dawn, including Rock Choir, helped to raise over £17,000 for St. Cuthbert’s Hospice. The family realised that this amount would have covered the staff costs of the In-Patient Unit at the Hospice for seven days, at the 2022 rate.  

“This felt, in some way, as though a ‘debt’ had been repaid. Dawn’s care costs, plus the care costs of the other in-patients who were in St. Cuthbert’s at the same time as Dawn, have been repaid by the fundraising. That’s a very comforting thought”, Maria reflected. 

Given the Hospice’s critical financial position over the past year, which sadly resulted in 18 redundancies and service reductions/closures, this funding came at a crucial time. 

Maria said: “that’s been a driving force as well.” 

She added: “it was a way to channel our grief […], so it’s been a lovely way of remembering her, but also obviously, helping the Hospice […] if everybody raised £40 or £100, it would make such a difference”. 

Highlighting the importance of ‘Keeeeep Rocking’ for the choir, Rob said: “A lot of my members have a strong connection with St Cuthbert’s Hospice and being able to give back to them is the least we can do. Dawn was a massive part of our choir community and being able to support the people who supported her really means a lot”. 

A fellow ‘Rockie’ who helped organise this year’s concert, Diane Sanderson, also commented: “when people understand the amazing bespoke work that takes place at St Cuthbert’s Hospice, they will want to support it. The Bailey family story and their courage in telling it has made a big impact on Rock Choir members”. 

Maria went on to describe the impact that Rock Choir has had on her own life. 

“It’s just a lovely thing to be a part of, and I see that as a gift from Dawn”.  

She added: “Then to resurrect my signing, I thought – it’s another gift from her – and again, that gives you comfort”.  

“I’ve discovered the joy of Rock Choir because of her […] so, I don’t think I can ever give up because she wouldn’t have […] I’m remembering Dawn and thinking, no, she would want me to carry on, so I’ll carry on”, she went on to say. 

I asked Maria if being part of Rock Choir and fundraising for the Hospice has helped her to deal with losing Dawn.  

She replied: “Absolutely. It’s certainly no compensation, but you can’t change what happened. I needed to find something positive to do, which was what I did. I thought, right, we’ll fundraise for the Hospice and that’s kept me going the last 3 years”. 

Finally, I asked Maria why she’d recommend joining Rock Choir. This was her response: 

“When you walk through that door, it doesn’t matter what’s happening outside. I came to realise it doesn’t matter if you’re a millionaire, if you’re living on benefits, if you’re in a big mansion, if you’re living in a hut. It doesn’t matter. The commonality we have is that we come together to create this sound and we have such a laugh and there’s been really good friendships formed […] it’s hard to put it into words, but it’s just such a great thing to do”. 

She went on to say: “For those two hours, you can switch off. You’re happy again”. 

Echoing this, Diane said: “There is always a buzz at rehearsals even before we settle down to the rehearsal agenda. It’s a friendly and welcoming environment”. 

I asked Rob about the benefits of joining a choir. Along with the physical benefits, such as improved posture and breathing, he highlighted the impact it has on emotional and mental well-being.  

He went on to say: “There’s something about standing shoulder-to-shoulder and singing in harmony that creates a sense of unity. You don’t need to talk about what you’re going through—just being there, singing together, can be a silent kind of support […] music meets people where they are, and helps carry them forward”. 

As our interview came to an end, one of the final comments that Maria left me with was this: “You lose somebody, you think it’s the end of the world- but this has been something that’s carried on shining and making me happy and bringing happiness to the family as well”. 

Music is often recognised for its cathartic, emotional and expressive power. Maria Bailey’s story of love, loss and, ultimately, light certainly proves this to be true.  

If you’re interested in joining Rock Choir, you can book a free taster session. Click here for more information. 

To see Rock Choir’s website, click here. 

To donate to St Cuthbert’s Hospice, see here for more details.